| update?! sorta. |
[13 Aug 2004|04:32pm] |
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mood |
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 indifferent |
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music |
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Merideth Brooks |
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time is going by too fast. i don't want this to end. i'm excited but scared. this year is going to be so hard and very different without him. i'm so afraid of losing my other half. i never felt so secure with someone when he's around and i never felt so alone & empty when he isn't. it will be hard in the begining..but i will get through it.
just love & enjoy.
<3 michelle.
why don't we hit restart,
and pause it at our favorite parts.
we'll skip the goodbyes.
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[14 Jul 2004|01:10am] |
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mood |
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 frustrated |
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all i have to say is FUCK drama.
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| we'll skip the goodbyes.. |
[17 Jun 2004|08:38pm] |
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mood |
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content |
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hmm..here's something I just wrote. I don't normally write poems but i felt it was the best way to express my feelings.
There is so many words I want to say
on how much I wish he could stay
thinking about the separation makes my smile dim
I will miss everything about him
His words of love, his laugh, his touch,
all the memories I will miss so much
When he comes back I hope he still smiles
Because ever time I see it my heart runs a thousand miles
Who knows what will happen, only time will tell
But until then I can only wish him well
I miss him already and I hate that he’s leaving
The thoughts of him being gone only send me grieving
But I am not someone to say anything against his dreams
Because I want him to be happy by all means
I just don’t want to lose such a perfect guy
But the time will come when we must say goodbye.
<3 michelle.
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| i miss you.. |
[14 Jun 2004|06:35pm] |
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mood |
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 bored |
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music |
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matchbook. |
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i've been in my house the past 2 fuckin days not even stepping outside and doing all the fucking stuff i was told to do and she still wont let me go out. she fuckin complains all i do is sit in my room, go on the computer or talk on the phone. she thinks i hate being around the family since i just stay in my room the whole day. but what else is there to do since i'm not allowd to leave? i was planning on looking for a job today but it's too much for my brother to drive me down the street just to pick up some applications. if i ask him for one little favor he thinks i'm just 'using' him. i fuckin washed his car last time he drove me somewhere. my moms like "the only time you talk to him is if you want him to drive you somewhere" ..that's fuckin bullshit. he's the one thats too involved with other things to talk.. and when we do converse he's always debating with me. he always jokes around saying "you're such an idiot or you're so stupid" every time i say something because he knows it pisses me off..i brush it off the first few times he says it but after awhile it gets to me and i start arguing with him. but how is that funny always bringing someone down?..uhh i really need to get out of here. maybe i should just take a bike ride and see if any places around here are hiring.
ambers leaving wednesday to South Carolina for about a month
moniek is leaving soon for new hampshire
andrea is leaving to malaysia for the whole summer tomorrow.
*tear* i'm gunna miss you all ;[
christian and samantha will still be here *gleee* :]
ahhhhhh i miss my love!.. i'm going crazy here without seeing you!
ThanksBye.
<3 michelle
ps: you all sould visit my xanga and listen, sing along or dance to the music: http://www.xanga.com/home.aspx?user=christian_is_my_hero
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| what to do.. |
[13 Jun 2004|05:11pm] |
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mood |
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indifferent |
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music |
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sugarcult. |
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hmm..so yesterday was a blast. i went tubbing for the first time on monieks boat...and i didn't fall off :]..wow it was so much fun. we out there for like 5 hours so i got fried. i really enjoyed hanging with moniek.. we havent done anything together in sooo long.
afterwords christian and jose dropped by and invited me to their friend hilary's graduation party. so then i went after convincing my parents to let me go.. the party kinda sucked. i didn't stay long because i had to be back by 10. christian drove me home and he stayed at my house for a little and just played on my guitar..while i was sleeping..i was soo tired and wasn't feeling too good...then he left and went back to the party.
today i did nothing. just stayed in bed most of the day..i really have to find something to do for the summer. i need money, i need a job, i need something to keep me active. i've been going to the gym lately so i don't feel as lazy..tomorrow will be the day i will REALLY look for a job.
goodbye.
<3 michelle.
ps: samantha, he'll be in my prayers <3
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| I want to lick you like a lolly pop ;] |
[10 Jun 2004|09:39pm] |
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mood |
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 tired |
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music |
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The samples |
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so the scavenger hunt kinda sucked. my team wasn't really interested in doing it..
it was samantha, katie, margret, quinn and I..but we did do some of the things. we went to a gay club and asked for an application, but they had none left. so then we went to the "gay store" next to the club to ask.. the walls were nicely decorated with penises and rainbows.. i found that pretty funny. i'm surprised they let us in..oh yea before we went in the people outside was asking us if we wanted to take a free HIV test and offered us free condoms..but we declined.
after we went to the culture room to see if there was any shows going on so we could take a picture with one of the band members. the band "The Samples" was there. we took our pictures and they gave us free demos. one of the members was like "you should go to our next show and you can be one of our first fans" haha so i felt bad so i promised to burn the demo for all my friends.
then we ran out of gas and no one wanted to do it anymore so i just had them drop me off. it was fun with the few things we did. i wish we did more..oh well..
woooohoo!! summers began!!
tomorrows a bonfire on the beach..i think i might go.
hmm..you know whats one of the best feelings is? falling asleep next to the person you love with your arms around them. i <3 you christian.
"i want to lick you like a lolly pop
and eat you like a peach" -The Samples
<33 michelle
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| lets get retarded...yo yo yo |
[06 Jun 2004|10:25pm] |
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mood |
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 mellow |
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music |
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black eye peas |
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i should go to church more often. i went with christian and his brother and sister this morning. we only made it to half the service because christian woke up late..but it was better than not going at all.
after we left to go to his graduation. it was a long and nice ceremony. man those lucky kids have nothing to worry about anymore. now all they can do is party, party, and party...until college comes..then party some more. no more having to worry about getting caught skipping, doing homework, riding the bus everyday, having class 7 hours everyday... darn i can't wait till i'm free. hmm i wish i could just graduate next year because all my credits will be done by then and for 12th grade i'll be taking bullshit classes anyway. well CONGRATS to whoever made it through 12th grade. 04 fo sho. peace to you all and your homies.
i have exams all week. good thing is we get out at 12:30..so it isn't too bad. well i should be going to bed soon. WOW i haven't gone to bed this early in sooo long.
sweet dreams all
<3 michelle.
this made me laugh:
| yourfakesmile's LJ stalker is xthornx! | | xthornx is stalking you because another friend of yours told them you liked them. They are also eating your food when you aren't looking! |
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| @#$% |
[05 Jun 2004|05:02pm] |
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mood |
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frustrated |
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rtdtfyjhiplkfy...i don't know what the fuck to do anymore..
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[03 Jun 2004|11:28pm] |
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mood |
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 optimistic |
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When the night has come
And the land is dark
And the moon is the only light we see
No, I won't be afraid
Oh, I won't be afraid
Just as long as you stand
Stand by me, so
* Darling darling stand by me
OoOoh, stand by me
Oh stand, stand by me, stand by me
If the sky that we look upon
Should tumble and fall
Ot the mountain
Should crumble to the sea
I won't cry, I won't cry
No, I won't shed a tear
Just as long as you stand
Stand by me, and
Whenever you're in trouble
Won't you stand by me, oh stand by me
Stand by me, stand by me, stand by me
OhHh, OoOoo...
<333 michelle.
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| . . . |
[02 Jun 2004|07:44pm] |
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mood |
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 worried |
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music |
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blink <3 |
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i never have felt this worried in a long time. ;[
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| teehee |
[30 May 2004|08:31pm] |
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mood |
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cheerful |
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music |
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LFO. fo sho. |
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i <3 publix janitors ;]
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| Can i be Your memory? |
[28 May 2004|12:11pm] |
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mood |
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relaxed |
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music |
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Sugarcult. |
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i was bored so i decided to change my layout.
this school year went by fast. i hope my next two years does the same. i'm going to miss my senior buddies so much when they leave especially chirstian. it's going to feel so different with them not there. i wish them all the best of luck in the future.
christian came over yesterday. we just lounged around watching tv most of the time.uhmm it was very relaxing.
hmm i think im going to go swimming, it's so nice outside.
<333 michelle.
"Waiting for You here
I'd be Your anything.."
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| fuck this place. |
[25 May 2004|06:58pm] |
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mood |
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 sad |
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i'm fuckin tired of this. i hate fuckin being here. i don't know what the fuck to do anymore. being alone just makes things worse....but where can i go?..how can i get away? how can i hide from this? what can i do? nothing.
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| i'm inlove with this feeling of love. |
[22 May 2004|06:05pm] |
yesterday was christian and i's 5 month anniversary. it couldn't of been any better. his confirmation was also yesterday so i made sure i was there. i haven't gone to church since the last time i took my confirmation(which was 2 years ago) so it felt great to be there. after we went back to his house for a little then we had a lovely dinner at the Olive Garden. i always love being with him..he makes me feel so happy.
(i gotta go, i'll update more later.)
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| Wandering this house |
[18 May 2004|07:00pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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gloomy |
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music |
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Saints and sailors |
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i hate being alone by myself. i come home with nothing to do and no where to go.. so i sleep to pass the time.
today i really wasn't feeling good. i felt so nauseous. maybe it was from the seafood i ate the night before. last time i ate at that restaurant i got bad food poisoning. this fucker in my 2nd hour didn't help. he started bitching at one of my friends for snitching on him for what he did wrong. he just made himself look dumb. i made him look like an asshole contradicting everything he was saying then he starts bad mouthing me because he's so insecure about himself. he fuckin starts getting up on my case. so what did we do to get him back? i rather not say...but i will anyway :] we took his water bottle and spit in it and one boy wiped his crotch on the mouth part. it was hilarious watching him drink from it. the scene was priceless. i never knew i can have so much dislike for one person. if i was a dude he would be dead. <3
hmm..i always feel special when someone calls me. it means someones thinking of me...i'll go make someone feel special since some people say i never call them.
<333 michelle
"waiting here with hopes the phone will ring.."
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